Stress is an illusion. When you appreciate how stress is created, you will start to understand that, not only are you the author of your own stress but that, in actual fact, stress does not exist in the real world. And, yet, the World Health Organization is of the opinion that stress will be one of the prime killers of the 21st century. The word ‘stress’ will not show up on death certificates, however. There’ll be heart disease, digestive disease, high blood pressure, kidney failure all up there as the usual suspects – the results of stress. Because, even though stress isn’t real, its effects are very real for its sufferers. And, yet, you create your own stress.
For sure, each day is full of challenges. For many, each day is an uphill struggle. But life’s pains and pleasures are just sent to try us. And, sadly, most of us aren’t up to the task. Why? Because we are conditioned to dwell on the negative, to think the worst, to feel inadequate, to react. The normal person never acts – they simply react. And in reacting, they don’t react to what is really taking place, their programmed minds react to what they perceive to be happening. Therein lie the seeds that flourish into stress – with all its very real related problems. Because, in reacting, we make things worse than we think they already are.
The normal subconscious was conditioned during our formative years. Since adolescence we’ve learned little new – we simply rehash the same behaviours, the same reactions, the same mistakes. As a consequence of our programming, we never see what’s really happening – we perceive what we think is happening and react according to our programming. And haven’t you ever noticed that reaction makes a bad situation worse?
Stress is the by-product of ineffective thinking. Something happens – or worse, something doesn’t happen but we think that it’s going to happen – and, as a downside of our own subconscious perceived inadequacy, we get stressed. You cannot control what is nothing more than an automatic chain reaction that is not based on the real world but on what’s going on in your own head. And it’s the way we are – we’re hard-wired that way. To be blunt about it, our minds control us, surely it should be the other way around. As sure a definition of lunacy as I’ve ever encountered.
So how can you break the habit of an adult lifetime? The short answer is ‘yes’ – but you must stop paying attention to the crap that’s doing your head in and you’ve got to start focusing on the reality of the present moment. In the present moment there is no stress. In fact, in the present moment, in spite of evidence to the contrary, everything is well. The secret to a stress-free life is found in being present in the reality of now. This is absolutely different from subconsciously living in a childhood long past and, because you’re hard-wired for self-destruction, it requires re-training.
Psychology has established that the state of mind of happiness is inextricably linked to giving full focus to the present. When one’s breath is taken away by the beauty of a setting sun or an out-of-the-ordinary life event like the birth of a child, we experience a natural high. You need to learn how to self-administer that natural high. And it can be simply achieved. First of all, you take small steps – for small steps lead to great leaps.
So, right now, after finishing this article, give yourself five minutes. Sit down, close your eyes and just listen. Do nothing else. Just hear what you are hearing. Don’t analyse what you’re hearing or what you’re feeling. Just listen. Your mind will put up a fight – it doesn’t like someone else – the real you – trying to grab the controls! So your normal useless thoughts will try to get your energy. Do not give in. However, don’t try to fight them, simply listen to the sounds around you.
With a few minutes’ work every day – regularly working through all your five senses – you will re-learn to focus on reality. And, in reality, there is no stress.
